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September 22, 2025By Bishop Joseph G. Hanefeldt
How many times have you heard people say, “If it wasn’t for my Faith, I would not have gotten through this.” In the many things that challenge us in life, so many times the gift of Faith is what enables us to persevere through times of adversity. Throughout the Gospels, when Jesus heals people, he underscores the miracle in their lives by saying that it was their Faith that saved them!
If that is the case, then why do parents wait or fail to have their children baptized? If Faith is the foundation of our lives, why do parents neglect the faith formation of their children? I think it is simply because they themselves have never had a personal encounter with Jesus that strongly affected them. Until we experience the saving love of our Lord, as so many did in the Gospel stories, we don’t see the priority, nay the urgency of baptism and religious education.
As disciples of Jesus, Faith is the greatest gift we have received. Faith first comes to us through baptism. It is then nourished at every celebration of the Eucharist. It is strengthened when we receive the seven-fold gifts of the Holy Spirit through confirmation. Because Faith establishes a relationship with our Lord, we can never “graduate” from being disciples of Jesus. No, we are lifelong learners in the ways of Faith.
Throughout our lives, our Faith is formed by formal instruction, private study and reading, retreats, conferences, devotions, spiritual conversations with others, spiritual direction and more. The problem is that many parents provide little direct faith formation for their children. The good news is that there is a growing movement in this country (and perhaps beyond) of faith formation in the family. Along with the efforts of a Catholic school or a religious education program, more parents are stepping up to teach their children at home, in the family. Studies suggest that when parents play a role in the faith formation of their children, along with parish religious education programs, Faith is most effectively passed on to the next generation.
Parents give their children all kinds of things, both necessary and unnecessary. But the most important thing they could ever give their children would be their own witness of Faith. As a kind of self-examen, consider these questions:
Do my children/grandchildren see me pray?
Do I pray with them throughout their lives, or only until they receive their first holy Communion?
Do I take my children/grandchildren to Mass and talk about it afterwards?
Do I speak with my children/grandchildren about the Faith and what it is that I believe?
Do I read the sacred Scriptures with them and have a spiritual conversation about the passage?
Do I have religious art in my home (e.g. crucifix, statues, rosaries, relics, pictures)?
Do I invite my children/grandchildren to participate with me in various devotions and prayers?
Do I see that my children/grandchildren receive religious instruction, and do I engage them in it?
Do my children/grandchildren observe my own ongoing faith formation and participation in the life of the Church?
Do I practice stewardship and outreach (works of mercy) to others, both in the parish and in the wider community?
Do my children/grandchildren know that I attend Mass on holy days of obligation and celebrate patron saints and other feast days?
Do my children/grandchildren see a continuity in what I believe and in behavior?
Do my children/grandchildren see that I am striving to be a saint and attain the glory of eternal life in heaven?
What makes Faith “stick” to the next generation is our intentional practice of it in our daily lives. Kids learn quickly what is phony about our spiritual lives if we say one thing but do another. Simply put, the old way of expecting someone else to provide faith formation for my children is broken and it’s time we admit it. The new way forward needs to be with integrity and clarity.
Thankfully, I see new signs of this integrity and clarity more and more in our diocese. Young parents want to lead by example, and they are. Families want to put Faith first in their homes, but they need a community of families to support them in forging ahead. With perseverance they are finding others who want more for their children than they themselves may have received. Together, they are becoming lifelong learners of Faith. That’s what true disciples are.
As we move through each stage of life, we encounter Jesus in beautiful and surprising ways. All of that continues to form and shape us to be more like the Master. Thus, transformed by the mystery of God at work in us through Faith, we have much to offer our children and grandchildren, starting with the witness of how we live each day.
Young people need the gift of faith shown to them in an authentic way, starting at home. I believe the number one parental priority should be the transfer of their Faith to the next generation! Your children will thank you for it!